Chapter 4 - The Soldier He Used to Be
They rode into Silver Creek together the following morning.
People stared.
Naira was accustomed to it.
Elias wasn't.
At Crawford's trading post, conversation stopped.
Crawford stood behind the counter.
“Naira.”
“Where did you take my husband?”
Crawford blinked.
“I don't know what you're talking about.”
Elias closed the door behind them.
“Hollis Mercer remembers.”
Crawford's face tightened.
“Hollis remembers whichever story buys his next whiskey.”
“He remembers Tomas alive.”
Naira stepped forward.
“You told me Tomas died.”
“I repeated what soldiers told everybody.”
“You were seen with the wagon.”
Silence.
Crawford looked at Elias.
“You don't know what you're stirring up.”
“Then explain it.”
“No.”
Naira's voice became dangerously quiet.
“Five years.”
Crawford wouldn't meet her eyes.
“Ask Voss.”
“Where?”
“I don't know.”
Elias slammed his palm onto the counter.
Crawford flinched.
That movement told Elias everything.
“You do know.”
Crawford swallowed.
“Fort Mason was abandoned two years ago. Voss bought land near San Pedro.”
Naira turned immediately.
Crawford shouted after her.
“You find him, widow, you might wish you'd left your husband dead!”
Naira froze.
Elias looked back.
“What does that mean?”
Crawford's face had already closed.
“Nothing.”
Outside, Naira mounted.
Elias followed.
They rode for nearly an hour before she spoke.
“What if Tomas did something terrible?”
Elias looked over.
“Would that change wanting the truth?”
“No.”
“Then don't borrow pain before you know you owe it.”
She considered that.
“Is that how you live?”
“No.”
“What do you do?”
“I borrow all of it.”
That earned another almost-smile.
They returned home near sunset.
Naira cooked.
Elias repaired a harness.
For the first time, their silence felt companionable.
Then she asked, “Did you have a wife?”
“No.”
“Someone?”
“Once.”
“What happened?”
“She waited through the war.”
“And afterward?”
“I came home.”
Naira looked confused.
“That was the problem?”
“The man she waited for didn't.”
He stared at his hands.
“I looked like him. Had his name. But I wasn't him anymore.”
“What did she do?”
“Married somebody else.”
“You blame her?”
“No.”
“You blame yourself?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because that's easier than blaming the world.”
Naira looked at him for a long time.
“You're foolish.”
Elias laughed quietly.
“Probably.”
Later, he noticed the turquoise beads on the table.
Naira touched them.
“I made these for Tomas.”
Elias didn't speak.
“They meant belonging.”
She slowly removed them.
“After him, they only meant waiting.”
She placed them down.
“I think I'm finished waiting.”
The words struck him harder than expected.
He looked at her.
“Do you still talk to him?”
Naira's gaze drifted toward the knife.
“When I can't sleep.”
Her voice softened.
“Sometimes I wake up and forget he's gone.”
Her hand rested against the blanket.
“I reach beside me.”
Elias remained still.
Naira swallowed.
“When I'm alone… my hands wander. They look for what's gone.”
Her composure broke.
Not dramatically.
No cry.
No collapse of strength.
Just one quiet step toward him.
Then another.
Her forehead touched his chest.
Elias hesitated before gently supporting her shoulders.
Naira closed her eyes.
For five years, she had refused to fall apart because there had been nobody trustworthy enough to catch her.
Now, for several seconds, she allowed herself to be held.
Nothing more.
When she stepped away, Elias released her immediately.
“I'm sorry.”
“Don't be.”
Naira wiped her cheek.
“Tomorrow we find Voss.”
Elias nodded.
But before dawn, hoofbeats thundered outside.
Elias woke instantly.
Naira grabbed her rifle.
Three riders stopped beyond the fence.
One called toward the cabin.
“Elias Ward!”
Elias stepped onto the porch.
“Who wants him?”
A man wearing a black coat moved forward.
“Captain Voss.”
Naira appeared behind Elias.
The rider smiled.
“Captain says you two should stop asking questions.”
Elias's face hardened.
“And if we don't?”
The rider tossed something into the dirt.
It landed at Naira's feet.
A military identification tag.
She bent down.
The name stamped into the metal was faded.
But readable.
TOMAS NANTAN.
May you like
And on the reverse side someone had scratched a date.
A date three years after Tomas was supposedly dead.
