Chapter 14 - Lily’s First Word for Me
I wanted Lily to call me Dad.
I never said it aloud.
She already had words.
Mama.
No.
More.
Dog.
Some mysterious sound that apparently meant banana.
But not Dad.
I told myself it didn’t matter.
Then one Saturday morning, I was making pancakes.
Lily sat in her chair.
Elena was upstairs.
I dropped a pancake.
Lily laughed.
“Very funny.”
She pointed.
“Da.”
I froze.
“What?”
“Dada.”
I stared at her.
She smiled.
“Dada!”
Elena came running because she thought something was wrong.
Instead, she found me crying beside a ruined pancake.
“She said it.”
“What?”
Lily slapped the tray.
“Dada!”
Elena covered her mouth.
We both cried.
Lily seemed delighted by her ability to emotionally destroy two adults with one word.
That night, after she fell asleep, Elena and I sat on the porch.
“I used to imagine this,” she said.
“What?”
“You meeting her.”
She leaned against me.
“At the farmhouse, when things were bad, I would imagine opening our front door and seeing you.”
I closed my eyes.
“I’m sorry it took me two years.”
She looked at me.
“You didn’t know where to look.”
“I should have questioned the funeral.”
“You were grieving.”
“I should have protected you.”
“Daniel.”
She waited until I looked at her.
“We survived. Don’t let Margaret steal the years after the farmhouse too.”
That became the rule we lived by.
Margaret had taken two years.
May you like
She would not get another day.
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